this information was forwarded to me by some anonymous retail lackey that has to put up with customer service surveys -- and customers. he assures me that these responses are indicative of the complaints received on a regular basis. i’ve posted the customer complaints along with his response. obviously he'll go far in PR.
goddamn shoppers.
-b
As you know my employer gives our customers the ability to go online and make comments on the service we give. This past week we got a ton of comments. I am sending you a few of the more interesting ones and my comments so that you may laugh. I have not changed any of them except to delete any “sensitive” information.
most of the problems i have encountered have been with the cashiers. several times i have checked out and the cashier never said 1 word to me. they dont have to hold a conversation, but a hello and thank you would be appreciated.
It should be apparent that our cashiers have all had lobotomies; it is the only way we can get people to stand in a stall all day and drag items across a bar code reader.
Most of the time, [Your store] is great. On this particular trip, it was the first time that I had been in this store and had some difficulty finding things. The few employees that I saw (it was near closing), they were too busy talking amongst themselves to notice me when I went up to ask a question. I found what I needed on my own. I know that this is a rare occurance. I usually find that your employeee are very helpful. This particular store, also looked like it could use a face lift.
First off, rest assured you were noticed by our employees. You were probably either A. interrupting their conversation with your incessant need for help or B. they noticed that you were in the store so close to closing time that they ignored your ass because you just needed to get the f**k out. We like to go home too. Also: yes, the store is old. Oh well.
the last few times I have walked in to the bathroom at this store, it looked like a pig sty. Clean bathrooms would be nice. Most of the time I can not find a price on an item and the scanners in the store are few and far between. The one in the card department has not worked in weeks.
Yes, clean bathrooms would be nice. As soon as you can get your fellow shoppers to stop trashing them like they are livestock, we will have cleaner restrooms. Also, you’d find the price if you’d bother to LOOK. It isn’t like we hide that information.
Open closer to my home, I just moved to The Colony, Texas. [one of numerous requests for this location. -b]
We’re not usually in the market to build stores for entire cults. Besides, chances are you’ll all kill yourselves in a mass suicide and the customer base for that store would fall.
make aisle in the checkout area wider. you can hardly fit your shopping cart,much less you and the cart.
The solution is simple: ONE THING AT A TIME wide ass [R., the ‘anonymous’ contributer of these survey results, is a wideass himself. not to mention smartass. but whatever. -b].
I was never offered help, even though I knew where the things I needed were stocked.
So obviously you didn’t need help. So what’s your point? WTF!?
Have additional checkers at the check-out stand during lunch hours. This will enable all of us "lunch time errand runners" to get in and out of the store quickly!
Well we can’t do that, we’re on lunch too.
When I do need help finding something, I can never find an employee to help me. I have to walk around for ten minnutes or go to a surrounding department looking for someone. Sometimes there aren't even any employees back in the electronic department. They have their own counter to work, I think that there should always be someone at that counter.
We’re usually hiding from the insane questions you shoppers ask. Chances are if you used those 10 minutes looking for the product instead of standing around aimlessly waiting on help, you could find whatever the devil it is you’re looking for. Also, we can’t just have an employee standing around doing nothing all day waiting for your dumbass to ask questions. Our corporate office frowns on that sort of indolent behavior.